5k Creeping

Hey people, Laura and I want to represent Ain't No at the 5k we're attending, but don't know how! We need some ideas. We're already going to be wearing a t-shirt, so I guess that won't work.

Today, I woke up 26 pounds lighter! Oh, yeah! This whole jogging thing is working out pretty nicely. Just to see how much I could take, I jogged as long as I could yesterday and made it to 10 whole minutes without stopping! I felt pretty good about myself since a month ago, I could barely do 1 minute. I also got this neat little book in the mail today called Run Your Butt Off. It's got some petty awesome ideas on how to start. They even have this neat thing where you can calculate how many calories you need in a day judging by how much you weigh and how much exercise you need to lose weight. I have to figure out where I would be if I had been using this book to begin with, I'm kind of farther ahead with the jogging stuff. Not to brag...but I'm FREAKING AWESOME.

And last but not least, go here and like our page and give us some feedback! We love support!
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Love and jog dogs,
MICHELLE

P.s. I want to say hey to my friend Walker right now. He looks amazing and I'ma need some advice from him. I saw him after maybe two years and he looks fit! JEALOULSZ

Let her dance dance

25 pounds, I'm coming for you. I'm only .6 pounds away and I'MA GET YOU. No, but for real, I'm 24.4 pounds less today. I'm pretty sure that's 11.4 for the competish. I'm still annoyed all 24.4. don't go towards the competition, but whaterr.

Things that I have been doing the past two weeks that have brought me to this point:
6 out of 14 days: Jog for 2 minutes, walk for 5
the other 6: Jog for 4 minutes, walk for 3.
Good carbs! Girly pushups! Half sit ups! Water water water!

And now for some pictures!

 Indigo resting her head on my shoulder after a good hike.












I put this picture up to show I still have work to do and have yet to enter hot stuff material.(maybe hot mess)

My adorable face is practically missing from this picture, but Alyssa and my cute dog are in it so okay, I guess it can be up here.













Now I must got assist in the killing of roaches. There will be blood.

Love and muffins,
MICHELLE

Oops, that was my bad

Yesterday, my mom, Laura, and Gain Gain (grandmother) came down to visit me for my belated birthday. First, I took them to a local restaurant and forced my mother to fall in love with their mahi mahi tacos. It was pretty cute. "These are so good! Guys, guys, you gotta try this! I've never had mahi mahi like this! Reminds me when I called them Maui Maui."

Laura on left and Michelle on right

Then, I took them hiking at The Preserve. I love this place. It's free and has pretty boulders to walk under and look at (even the graffiti is nice). Admittedly, I was never a scout, so I definitely got us lost, and mom stopped to talk to every person and child we passed, so it took a good two hours. I continued to say,"Not much longer!" having no idea where we were. After about 3 or 4 miles, we finally came to a fairly wide creek and I crossed it using some rocks that were above water. My grandmother asked to go another way, but, of course, I insisted on going this way and that I would help her.

GAIN GAIN!

As we're nearing the the last rock, Gain Gain chatting about something or other, the rock underneath her feet gives and she falls, causing me to slip, but as soon as I got my bearings and I had hold of her, I slipped again and down came Grandma. The entire left side of her body was immersed in water, including her head. All I could see was her lovely perm floating above the water. My mother was screaming,"MAMA! MAMA! SOMEONE GET HER UP! GET HER UP!" but not moving an inch (moral support) and Laura and I dove after her. Thankfully, I still had a hold on her or else she might have cracked her head against a rock.


By the time we got her up, sputtering and all, we were all laughing so hard we were crying (or maybe we were crying first). I felt so bad, but she went on and on about how much she enjoyed it. If you're related to me, this is a daily occurrence.

On another note, tonight, while jogging, I passed a group of people sitting out on a porch and one said, "everytime you pass, I start singing the rocky theme song." I wanted so badly to come up with something clever back, but wheezy wheeze had taken over.

Since I'm not eating chocolate, I've found a new desert that looks delicious. blueberry peach crisp

Love and teddy roosevelt,
MICHELLE

I see you baby, shaking that thang

My first question is this: Why the brownies did no one tell me there's cocoa in red velvet? My suffering from giving up chocolate has been all a lie! I've been eating chocolate this whole time packed all in one single, delicious red velvet cup cake. Admittedly, though, I'm not entirely distressed about this. When I think of chocolate, I don't naturally think of red velvet. So, we're going to pretend I didn't eat them (and go ahead and pretend I won't eat a few more).

I want to give a shout out to the people across the seas reading this blog. I didn't know that there was this adorable little thing that tracks countries that have viewed the blog, and there are quite a few that aren't the U.S. So, hey! (Let's be friends so I can have a free place to stay when I come visit your country, okay?)

An important thing to remember when housesitting is that there are neighbors that don't know who in the whoa you are. That being said, the yesterday I learned a very awkward, hard lesson. There's a giant window in the kitchen of this house that has virtually no covering. And, as I tend to do daily, I found myself dancing around the house. The family that lives here has two little boys and they have a mother ton of fake guns around, so I was also playing 007 with one of those while dancing.

So, let's go over this quickly. Imagine a chubby (adorable) girl dancing around the kitchen in broad daylight with a black gun in her hand in a house that you know to not belong to said girl.

I noticed a woman walking her dog down the street stop in front of the house and peer into the window at me dancing around with a gun in my hand. Needless to say, I watched out for cops all day yesterday to come here and arrest me for dancing burglarly (mostly just the dancing was a crime). It probably didn't help that as soon as she saw me, I dropped down to the ground to cover myself. Oops.

Love and cupcake betrayal,
MICHELLE

happy birthday, mildred

Heyoooo! So, I'm fairly sure that I've lost another 1.6 pounds, so that's total 21.6, and I have no idea how much of that is towards the competition. Maybe 8 pounds? I really have no idea. Tomorrow I start week 3 of 5k training and I'm slightly nervous. I have to make the jump from 2 minutes jogging to 4, and I'm not so sure I'll be alive this time tomorrow. But alas, we'll see. All for Cotton Row (What is it we're raising money for again? I feel douchey asking that question).

Today is my twenty-second birthday and, admittedly, it was hard typing that. I grew fond of my lovely twenty-one year old status. So far, I haven't eaten anything too terrible. I stuffed my face (literally, there are pictures) with a kabob at the birthday kickball game I shad. It was DELICIOUS. And I brought vegetable chips and dip, so not the worst thing I could have had on my birthday. Kickball was so much fun! Except for the part where a large man literally screamed at us several times to not get on the dirt on the softball field. I was all like,"Yo, we got it!" and he was all like,"I'MA TELL YOU THREE MO TIMES, THEN. STAY OFF THE DIRT!" Along with several more statements about staying off the dirt (we didn't).

Alyssa and I have been housesitting for this family and, since they did say we could have whatever food was in the kitchen, I have found this week to be a tough one. See, at my own apartment, food can be scarce, so it's easy to ration. But here I am in this big ole house attacking the fridge without mercy. I really have no idea how I've lost a pound this week. It makes no sense. As soon as I saw their kitchen all I could think was,"As God is my witness, I will NEVA go Hungry AGAYAIN!" We made velvet cupcakes with homemade blackberry icing and, yeah, I definitely went a tad overboard on the cuppycakes. WHY ARE THEY SO GOOD.

Oh, and I also found a box of chocolate chip cookie brownie mix. Yeah, that's right. It's a cookie. AND IT'S A BROWNIE. How could they do this to me? Didn't they know I gave up chocolate only a week ago? I'm still weak. Still very, very weak. And why on mother earth did I give up chocolate a week before my day of birth? Seriously, Michelle? That was stupid.

Going to the movies tonight after hitting up so fat free frozen yogurt at Yogurt Mountain. I need some good birthday recipes on the real.

Love and kickballs,
MICHELLE

P.s. We're starting a kickball team named Ball Kickers if anyone wants to join.
.

Ugggggghhhhhh.....

Would be the "word" to describe how I feel right now.

So I'm sick...on my Spring Break. Awesome.

Things I don't really want to do while I'm sick: think, move, do an in-depth blog post.

Things I want to do while I'm sick: sleep on the couch, waiting on the meds to kick in.

It's sad too, because I had a really good post where I talked about making any recipe low fat. (Teaser: I chased an older lady down in the grocery store because I had a question about a red beans & rice recipe. She had on a Mardi Gras sweater, so I just assumed).

I have managed to continue with my 5k training. Yesterday, during one of my two minute jogging spurts, I'm pretty sure my body did a total double-take, asked "Are we really doing this?" and decided to rebel. Long story short, yesterday was hard and the first time I actually thought about giving up on the whole thing.

But I didn't

Weight loss update: As of last Wednesday weigh-in, I have lost 10.4 lbs, 6.4 of those go towards the competish. Yay! I'm also proud of my fellow competitor for losing the big 20! No really, I am.

Countdown Until Cotton Row: 78 days.
Countdown until I go to the doctor because I can't stand having a cold: 24 hours at the least

The 20 pound mark has been passed

So, yes, I've lost 20 pounds. And, since I only talk about what I eat sporadically, I thought I would sit down and make a list of things that I do and do not eat, exercises I do, and everything else that has led me to lose twenty pounds, because, after today, I'm changing things up (maybe not the food part, I think I need that to survive).

1. If I go out to eat, I check the restaurants website for calorie information, and that's how I chose what to get. I only eat half of the serving given, if that. You would be incredible surprised at how many calories are in food at restaurants.
2. I only drink water. If I'm feeling extra proud of myself, I might drink a diet drink, but those really aren't that great for you, so I generally just drink water.
3. I eat fruits and vegetables every day. If you like to eat a lot, then eat a lot of that stuff, because, I don't know if anyone has told you (I certainly had no idea), but those babiez are low CAL.
4. I pace myself. I take a bite of something and take a few gulps of water. Doing this makes me full faster.
5. I don't eat white grains (white bread, white rice, white tortillas...is that even a grain), potatoes, or fried foods. I started doing this later, though. I had to wing myself slowly off of it, or I would have turned into a fire breathing dragon.
6. I don't eat late. I try not to eat after 7 or 8, but if I do, it's fruit.
7. I exercise almost every day for 30min-1hour. If I don't, I at least do ab work outs and lunges with hand weights.
8.I read labels on almost every food I consume and, yes, I still hate math.
9. I don't generally eat cheese, but if I do, it's the VERY low calorie, low fat kind. a.k.a, the kind that tastes like nothing.
10. I think of something disgusting every time I think I want food that isn't good for me.

And that, ladies and maybe three gents, is pretty much exactly what I've been doing since the beginning of February. I am not going to lie to you, the first week I started this was horrible and all I wanted was to eat everything and anything. Since I'm still not yet a success story, I can tell you I definitely have motivation issues and I have to work on my self control every day, but I know one thing for sure: I'm not giving up on this. I'm expecting a lull in the weight loss after this week, and I know that discourages me beyond belief, but it's okay.

Training for the 5k has proved successful so far. I'm on week 2 where I walk 5 minutes, jog 2 minutes. It takes a lot of willpower for me to actually jog 2 minutes without hitching a ride from a nearby car and going home.

Oh, and I'm giving up chocolate for lent. A warning to those of you that have to be around me. My birthday is in 6 days and my favorite bday cake is a reesies ice cream cake. I can already feel myself turning into a grizzly bear and storming downtown.

Love and grizzly adams,
MICHELLE

I'm a maniac...no, seriously

So, I just wanted to take this time to let everyone know I made a facebook page for the bloggy so that people can easily get into contact with us and find our blog. And you may find the page in this ridiculously long link:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Aint-No-Size-Zero/139296796137708#!/pages/Aint-No-Size-Zero/139296796137708

Tonight, I went jogging and passed a car with a very loud toddler in it, and, when she saw me, she started screaming,"SLOW DOWN! SLOOOOOW DOWN! MOMMY, SHE WON'T SLOW DOWN!" And I was like,"What? I'm going too fast to hear you ahhhhhhh!" It was a weird moment, I'm not going to lie to you.

I've been really into a half sandwich/soup combo lately, and that's mostly because my grandmother gave me a mother ton of a homemade soup. I had her white chili tonight and oh mah lawd, it was superb. She made me dinner on Saturday night and, when I didn't finish the huge bowl of chili she made me, she was convinced I hated it. She's obviously used to mondo Michelle eating everything in sight (I just imagined myself as the huge marshmellow in ghostbusters saying,"NOMNOMNOMNOM!"). I even found myself snatching my half eaten bowl from my mom and saying,"YOU'RE IN TRAINING!" Things are getting a bit weird upstairs in my brain.

If you feel so inclined, leave a comment or contact us on the facebook page.

Love and chubby kittens,
MICHELLE

Michelle just got serious, ya'll

I'm not going into too much detail, but I've already lost more weight since I weight myself, so

THE COMPETISH IS SOOOO NOT ALL THAT CLOSE.

Anyway, moving on. Mom and I did 5k training in the pouring rain today. It was pretty crazy. My glasses were so weat that I didn't see the large puddles I was drenching myself in until I felt it on the back of my badunkadunk. Mom did really well, though. She never complained or asked to go home, even though she was drenched.

On a more serious note, it has recently come to my attention that there are those out there in world who view people overweight as "lazy" and that they should not blame genetics or parenting. I'm going to speak for myself here and say that yes, I'm overweight, but I am by no means lazy. There are several contributing factors to a person being overweight that have nothing to do with that word. There are differences in every person's body, so it is completely obnoxious to establish a blanket statement on overweight people.

Top 3 reasons not to piss off an overweight person:
1. we can sit on you, stupid.
2. in wrestling, we would probably win...and make you look stupid.
3. we can lose weight and feel amazing and realize how little you matter...and find a way to make you look more stupid.

I'm sorry for my Shant (Charlie Sheen rant). I'm just a little tired of being ridiculed, aren't you? Let's do something about that. We should all be supporting each other, not bringing one another down.

Love and a motivatin'
MICHELLE

Weightloss Update!

I'm checking in to let everyone know that I weighed in on Friday and I have lost a total of 8.6 lbs (counts to Scale Back Alabama). Of that, 4lbs counts for the competish.

That's right! Michelle is only beating me by 0.2 lbs. Do you feel the heat? BECAUSE IT IS ON!!!

This competish is sooo close.

I have a question, Michelle---Can you feel me breathing down your neck as I gain (or in this case lose) on you? I'm am rounding the corner at breakneck speed and I'm stepping on your heels....

I am now realizing that I am not that great at sports metaphors, but just understand that I am in it to win it! WOO WOO!!


In other news, all three of us (Michelle, our mom, and I) jogged in the rain today to prepare for our first 5k. DEDICATION!

Countdown to Cotton Row: 86 Days

Countdown to Cotton Row

So Mom talked me into doing a 5k. It’s always been one of those things that was on my bucket list. I never thought it would come up in 11 weeks! So I started training today. We are doing the Cotton Row Run in Huntsville on May 30^th (http://www.roadraceplace.com/races/cotton-row-run-5k-alabama-huntsville/). My plan for week 1
is as follows:

Week 1: Day 1: Walk 5 min; jog 1 min. Repeat 4 times

Day 2: Brisk Walk 20 min.

Day 3: Walk 5 min; Jog 1 min. Repeat 4 x’s

Day 4: Brisk walk 20 min.

Day 5: Walk 5 min; Jog 1 min; Repeat 4x’s

It gets harder, until eventually I am jogging thirty minutes.

As I said, I started today. I began really great…but by the third time my legs felt heavy and I was WEEZY! I got through it though. Gotta have a first day, you know?

Count down to Cotton Row: 88 days

Oh, and to respond to the blasphemous accusations that I am losing:

I don’t know! Because, I have not weighed in this week. It is Dr. Seuss week, which equals me forgetting to weigh in. I will be updating tomorrow with how much I have lost this week and we will just SEE who is doing the wining around here!

Love and losing (of the fat),

Laura

This is for all you bloggers out there

I don't know why I put that as my subject. I just really wanted to say it. So, I know I said I would weigh myself after a month, but I did it anyway and GUESS WHAT?!

I've lost another 4.2 pounds! What chicka what! So, that means I have lost 17.2 pounds and 4.2 pounds for the competish. That's right, Laura. I be a winnin'.

Anyway, that's all I really had to say. Laura, mom, and I are going to do a 5k at the end of May, so I'm going to start training for it. My basic training shhhedule is as follows:

·  Before you start your workouts, make sure you warm up properly by walking for 5-10 minutes. You should always end your workout with a cooldown.

·  Week one: Walk for 6 minutes, then jog at an easy pace for 1 minute. Repeat 3 times. Aim for three sessions with that same sequence for week one.

·  Week two: Walk for 5 minutes, then jog for 2 minutes. Repeat 3 times. Aim to do three sessions in week two.

·  Week three: Walk for 3 minutes, then jog for 4 minutes. Repeat 4 times. Aim for four sessions in week three.

·  Week four: Walk for 2 minutes, then jog for 5 minutes. Repeat 4 times. Shoot for four of those sessions in week four.

·  Week five: Walk for 2 minutes, then jog for 8 minutes. Repeat 3 times. Do four of those sessions in week five.

·  Week six: Walk for 2 minutes, then jog for 9 minutes. Repeat 3 times. Try to do four sessions for week six.

·  Week seven: Walk for 1 minute, then jog for 11 minutes. Repeat 3 times. Do four sessions this week.

·  Week eight: Congratulations on making it to week eight! For your first run this week, try walking for 5 minutes to begin and end the workout, and run for 20 minutes in between. By the end of the week, try to run for 30 minutes without stopping.

I can already jog for an ENTIRE MINUTE (holy whatchu say?!) forreals. And then I wheeze (is that even how you spell that?).  I will be filling you in on this ordeal ever week, so keep on a readin'. And if you're so bold as to do this with me, let me know (although I doubt it, ya pansies).

Love and spandex,
MICHELLE